No exercise, relax, lose some weight, my way.

I’m happy to say, my diet worked. I had originally planned to write this blog post about 4 months ago. Then I realized. How am I supposed to write a blog post on losing weight when I haven’t even lost the weight yet?

So, I took some time to prove this worked, took some before and after photos and you know what?

You’ll be amazed ladies and gentlemen, for I am one skinny ‘fella right about now. In fact, I lost a total of 30 pounds, but not to brag or anything let’s continue..

Hold on. Wait. If you can’t sit through the explanation of why this works and all the little kinks of how-to, I’ll have a section for outlining the entire diet at the end of this post, so scroll-down lazypants. Prepare to lose at least 10 pounds…

Why did I go on this diet?

I’m around 5’7” and I’ve had abs before. Last time I was ripped I weighed somewhere in the range of 145 pounds and had around 7% body fat.

Not bad huh? So I knew that in order for me to have abs, it wasn’t necessarily about the crunches I did. I mean, you can have abs with 20% body fat, but you’re going to have to learn to looooove the gym. Maybe it’s just me and my new-found freedom. I equate the feeling I have running on a treadmill with the same feeling a mouse must have using his spinning wheel. I refuse to be caged! Even at a restaurant, I’ll choose the bar over a booth, this beautiful jail they call a booth, preventing me from engaging unattached women in sexually liberating interactions. I won’t stand for it! I need to be amongst the people. Revolution! Anyways, back to my point.

I reached 150 pounds after starting at 180 pounds. Here are some impromptu photos I took of the scale at the grocery store.

Of course, I haven’t got pictures of exactly the drop from 180 to 150 (see: impromptu), but I hope you get the idea.

How did I create this diet?

I’ve gained and lost weight before. In fact, I played some football in high school, so I understand what it takes to commit to something. Yet, as I touched on earlier the last time I was ripped, it was super hard. And, since it was so hard to get to that point, it took me only one month to lose my abs.

Here’s what my old plan was, and maybe you can understand why it was so hard to keep the weight off back then.

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Old Diet Plan

(do not use this diet plan, it works, but my point is to show you, that it’s too hard)

I would eat within one hour of waking up. Eating within an hour of waking up was said to keep your metabolism going. Then I would eat 5 meals a day all within about 3 hours of each other. Jeez, I spent a lot of timing eating. I would track what I would eat and carried around a small notepad to check off the food groups I ate and I would estimate how many calories I consumed a day. Oh, gawd I wasted time with stupid calculations. Also, I did not eat past 8 pm, because it was also said that after 8 pm your metabolism won’t burn the food you consumed.  Too many restrictions. Also I had a work-out regiment that spanned over 5 days a week and I was taking diet pills! … I think you get it. Way too hard, way too much to think about, the diet pills had too much caffeine and I would become way too jittery for my own liking, but it worked… at least until I couldn’t take it anymore. As soon as I ended the routine I gained all the weight back. Whomp Whomp.

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Ok, now I want to present you with a new way of thinking. Everything I do in my life is about being efficient. To me that means being able to do the least amount of work possible and still get the highest amount of results possible. That’s called being efficient. Using your head to save your legs. An old boss of mine told me that we should strive for moving at optimum speed rather than maximum speed. Instead of tiring yourself out, why not make it easy for you and still get the same results. I’m for ‘em!

So how does that same philosophy of efficiency translate into dieting? Well how about a diet that requires no exercise, minimal and effortless tracking and can fit your lifestyle… the only con would be explaining your weird eating habits to your friends.

No Exercise, No Stress Diet.

I wanted to create something, that was easy to manage. That you didn’t have to put much thought to. Yet, you will still have to put some effort into a few things, which we will touch on later. Like, remember to keep track of the days that you do CHEAT on your diet, keep track of your current weight, your target weight and your before/after photos.

Ok before we get into the ‘how-to’ of this post, let’s go over some of what led to me gaining all this weight and why I decided to shed the pounds. As you know, 145 was my target weight and I started at 180 pounds.

At 180 pounds I felt tired, lazy and I didn’t feel attractive, that’s for damn sure. Yeah sure, when I got a few drinks in me I could care less, but reality was that I wouldn’t even let women touch my belly because I was so embarrassed. Even worse, all my cool clothes didn’t fit. I seriously reached the point of having nothing to wear but basketball shorts and t-shirts. How was I suppose to live? I don’t know exactly how I gained the weight, but it was a culmination of things. And people do this all time. Of course, it was me not paying attention to what I put in my body. I ate a lot. I was traveling, so that also served as an excuse to eat whatever I wanted.

Now, don’t worry if you live a nomadic lifestyle. You can still execute this diet perfectly, it’s why I made it so easy to think about. I executed this while living in the same place for 4 months but once I get back on the road it’ll still be easy to subscribe to this diet because I managed to still eat out or binge on gas station snacks without jeopardizing my diet.

Now, there will be some restrictions. That’s just the cost of being sexy. I think it’s an even exchange. I believe it was Kate Moss who said – “Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels.” And trust me, I feel a whole lot better now.

As I touched on already, there will be no need for exercise. I believe it was Mike Geary who said “Abs are made in the kitchen”. It was me who said “It’s amazing what your body can do once you get out of it’s way”. Feel free to print that in the papers

No Exercise, No Stress Diet – How-To

No Carbs

Some of you may be familiar with low-carb diets. The idea here is that the body will go into what we call ketosis. What happens after a few days without any carbs is that your body will instead of using carbs as it’s energy source will start to use and burn fat. So, think about it like this. Your body burns energy (somewhere around 100 calories an hour) watching TV. That energy is your body burning its carbs.

Well, if you haven’t had any carbs for a few days, (that’s why it’s best to have No Carbs) it will instead be burning fat instead of carbs. So, what is happening is that, you can sit and watch TV and lose weight as long as you haven’t had any carbs for a few days.

Pretty cool huh? Another great thing about this, is that you don’t have to worry about your fat intake. Most diets call for you to eat low-fat, low-sugar substitutes of your favorite foods. Well, not this diet. You can eat as many fatty foods as you want as long as your daily intake of carbs are under 40 grams. To burn fat even faster keep your carb intake under 20 grams. In the first week you might lose 5 pounds immediately. But, remember it’s all about time and sometimes you might not lose any weight, just stick to it. It’s about time, not about effort here. The effort should be focused on creating new eating habits.

You shouldn’t even have to be completely obsessive about counting carbs. You can estimate this easier by eating less meals a day. Which we will go over later.

One last thing to consider is that, I did not exercise. At all. So, I wouldn’t suggest exercise, because with the lack of carbs I wouldn’t know how that will affect your energy and you might just feel horrible if you decide to start exercising while decreasing your carb intake by so much.

No Carb Eating Habits

Say NO to all starches. You’ll have to forget about breads, potatoes, rice, cereal, pastas, and breaded fried food, which seem to go with most meals. Even though only one serving of a given starch may only have 20 grams of carbs (which doesn’t exceed your daily carb limit) it’s still best to not allow yourself to indulge in carbs at all. Carbs are known to release certain chemicals in your brain, which usually result in increased cravings and bingeing compulsions. Save these starches for your Cheat Day buddy or you’ll have an earlier Cheat Day than planned. And don’t worry, even if you do have a spontaneous Cheat Day (which I have yet to cover, which might explain your confusion) don’t beat yourself up about it. I’m actually writing this post now after waking up from a cheat day induced food coma myself.

No Dairy

That’s not so hard to think about. Cheese, yogurt, milk and ice cream. Yet, this food group is the one I am most lenient about. Because the only reason you are restricted from this food group is because the way your body digests the milk sugar (lactose) in these products can be counted for as carbs. But, if you read the labels you can see most of them don’t have any carbs accounted for anyways. So, for most of the time, stay away from this food group, yet allow yourself to indulge in some fine cheese (or other dairy products) 2-3 times a week (don’t count it as a Cheat Day), just be aware enough to not allow yourself to over do it. This shouldn’t be too hard to think about, and don’t beat yourself up about it. But remember: if your weight loss is plateauing, (typically on those last 10 pounds) then dairy products should be cut out completely at least until you reach your target weight.

No Fruit

What? No fruit? Yeah, sorry dude. No fruit. In the most popular of low carb diets, fruits are to be cut out completely. If you want to google it, go ahead, but here’s a little more persuasion. Our european ancestors would go 3 quarters of a year without fruit because they weren’t in season. To all my Floridian friends – yeah, in some places it does snow. Fruits are not essential to the human diet. So cut them out at least until you reach your goal or go ahead a binge on fruits during your required cheat day.

Yes Protein

Finally some eating options. I say Yes to all kind of meats, seafood, chicken, eggs etc. I say Yes to them all. Even if they are high in fat. Go ahead enjoy.

But of course you can be a bit more restrictive and go for leaner cuts of meat, but this is my favorite part of the diet. The fact that I can still go to a brazilian steakhouse buffet and stuff my face full of Picanha. (worth experiencing)

Yes Fat

Fats would include things other diets plead you avoid. Avocados, nuts, peanut butter, beans, sauces etc. If they are not starches, have low-to-no carbs, are high in fiber, are not fruits or dairy then it’s all good with me.

Side note: Fiber is great for a low-carb diet. If you start eating a lot of protein you might experience some constipation. This is normal. Fiber works to correct that. You can lose a few pounds within a day of adding fiber to your low-carb diet.

Yes Veggies

Veggies are awesome. Now, I actually went without veggies for a week or two. I mean c’mon man, they really suck. Unless I was putting cheese on them (that’s totally okay, cheese can be considered a sauce) then I just couldn’t manage getting my veggie grub on. But! I have found a new way to enjoy veggies. Don’t worry Kevo’s got your back

Garlic Butter Recipe

You can follow the link above to get the recipe I use to create Garlic Butter. Now, I’m no expert chef, but what I do know is what tastes good. Once I learned this recipe the vegetables I eat taste 10x better than the teriyaki chicken I make. Seriously. I can eat carrots like bugs bunny. Probably don’t look as cool but here’s what I do. I throw some garlic butter in a frying pan. Toss in some frozen vegetables. Drop some more garlic butter on top of the vegetables and let them cook. Try ‘em. They are delicious. Delicious.

If you spent some time looking up proper recipes, then you can enjoy some of the most amazing meals at home. I haven’t found interest in looking up and trying new recipes, I stick to pretty basic cooking, but I’m sure in the next few months I will try some new and exciting recipes. Luckily for me, I could eat almost the same thing everyday and I won’t get bored as long as I’m losing weight. So figure out if variety is important to you. If so, please share in the comments section below what new recipes you have discovered.

Sauces

Don’t skimp on the sauces. Sauces are going to be your savior. You might find yourself eating the same plethora of protein. Yet, remember what it is like to eat out. At restaurants all dishes are cooked in or come with an accompanying sauce. Shop around and see what kind of tastes you like to add to your proteins in order to fulfill our tastebuds’ passion for variety. It makes it easier to even skip a cheat day completely (which you won’t need to). The only sauce I would concern you to be restrictive with is BBQ sauce. It tends to have a whole lost of carbs per serving, but remember, don’t beat yourself up about it, if you indulge from time to time, don’t count it as a cheat day (a bit like the dairy guidelines).

Eating Out.

Say you are on the run. What to do? You’ve only got a few bucks and can only afford the time and money to stop at the gas station or your local fast-food chain.

Gas stations are easy. Slim-Jims are no carb. All nuts are allowed (I suggest trying some new flavors). Salt & Vinegar almonds satisfy any cravings that seem only the biggest bag of potato chips can handle. Opt for the almonds. Also, I know this sounds crazy, but you can have pork rinds. They seriously have no carbs.

There are also some great dips out there that you can check out, spinach dips and the like. An odd of enough snack can be pork rinds and spinach dip (yeah, I know). But, it doesn’t effect your carb intake at all.

Concerning fast-food, we all know they are lacking in nutrients. Yet, you’ve got to eat, right Speedy Gonzalez? I like burgers. If I order a burger or two I just make sure to not eat the bun. Yeah it’s a bit messy, but it’s worth it, and I promise you won’t want the buns once you eat all the veggies and protein inside. Just trash the buns, no one likes them anyways.

Eating-out? A few of my favorite meals are BBQ Ribs or Fajitas. You can eat ribs, it’s totally cool, just ask for veggies in place of the starchy sides that tend to go with these dishes. As far as Fajitas go, just dump all the sauces on your protein and don’t touch the tortillas. It’s just as filling and even more satisfying when you know you are losing weight. I’m sure you can figure out other methods of skipping on carbs totally when eating out. Oh yeah, another great appetizer are non-breaded chicken wings. They are filling, taste great and as long as they are not breaded, munch away. nom nom nom.

Drinking

I’m a drinker. Unfortunately, beer has too many carbs to indulge in. Somewhere around 10 grams of carbs a serving. Same thing with wine. But, I don’t mind having a glass or two of wine (but no more than 3), I’m not going to beat myself up about that. I mean, if you are cutting out all other carbs then I couldn’t see why a glass of wine would hurt.

I think your psychology here is most important. If you completely cut out everything you like, than it’s going to be hard to keep this diet going for long. It’s all about time here, and the longer you go on this diet, the more weight you will lose.

But, I do drink a lot when I’m going out to the bars. So, to keep up on my diet I’ll drink Whiskey Neat. All spirits as far as I know, have no carbs at all. So as long as you’re not using mixers than you can drink as much liquor as you want.

Now, if you do want to use a mixer opt for diet coke. Diet coke has no carbs. At all. Whiskey and diet coke has become a usual for me while having to give up my staple gin & tonic (tonic has 20 grams per serving, yikes!)

As far as none alcoholic beverages go, remember to stay away from carbs. Diet drinks are mostly carb-free. Check out crystal light in order to add flavor to your water. Which you should be having 8 servings a day of to stay hydrated.

If you ever have any doubts on what you can and can’t have, you can always quickly google on your smart phone the carb count for just about anything (given you have a smartphone).

If you have any questions concerning my irreverent style of diet, please comment. The point here is to not have to worry so much over serving sizings or counting carbs, I want you to be at the point where you can guesstimate your carb intake and still properly lose weight.

Look, I’m not the kind of guy who has ever been naturally thin. I have always been a bit chubby growing up. So, if you are overweight, don’t think you can’t do this too.

Keep on this diet regimen for at least 1 month. Then, you can try something else. I’m not a doctor. I just know what has worked for me.

Here’s the most flattering picture of me at 180 pounds.

Here is a picture of me about a week ago, at 150 pounds

Cheat Day

Lastly, I will go over one of the most confusing and fun parts of this diet. The cheat day or ‘fat-kid day’ some call it is vital to this diet. The most important thing to remember is this diet is a day-by-day process. You can only have one cheat day a day. Isn’t that convenient? You can’t cheat more than once a day huh. On your cheat day you can eat anything, seriously, I mean anything and as much of that anything you want. Go crazy, you’ve earned it.

But here are some things you might face while on your non-cheat days. Uh-oh, had too much BBQ sauce. Oh crap, your boss insisted you have a bite of his home-made cookies. This might make you feel like you need to give up and just count this day as a cheat day. No worries.

One meal isn’t going to ruin your carb count. If you flub up on one meal, especially if it’s late in the day, then don’t count it as a cheat day. Only if you really binge or start eating whatever you want from earlier in the day, then count it as a cheat day. You will know you are cheating because you are probably so stuffed and lethargic that you actually feel like you gained weight.

Now, the cheat day is an important part of this process, for a few reasons. First, because it’s psychological. You are rewarding yourself for your hard-work and you are not depriving yourself of some of your favorite foods. Complete restriction typically results in constant and compulsive eating habits.

It also helps you lose weight. Since you have restricted your carb intake what will happen over-time is that your metabolism will slow-down because it doesn’t have a whole of energy to burn anymore. Once you ‘pig-out’ on your cheat day your metabolism will go into work-mode to start breaking down all of those carbs once again. You will be surprised when a day after your cheat day you have lost a whole 5 pounds. It happens, seriously.

The only rule to keeping your cheat day from infringing upon your diet is to not have a cheat day more than 3 days a week. 4 days means that you have eaten horribly for the majority of the week. If for the majority of your time passed is spent eating right, than your body has no choice but to drop the weight. For major weight-loss results keep your cheat day count to under 4 a month, or once a week. But, remember: don’t be so hard on yourself.

Keep Track

What you will keep track of are the days you do cheat. If you have a physical calendar on your wall or one you keep on your smartphone. Whenever you come across a cheat day. Write it in big letters on your calendar. CHEAT DAY. Just so you know which days you cheated and the length of time in between each. That’s all you have to keep track of and its take a minute to write that out.

Also, try to weigh yourself every few days to see how you are coming along with your weights goals. A plus if you manage to take before and after pictures.

Modifications

Notes on skipping breakfast. Some say that skipping breakfast is diet suicide. I find it to work perfectly for me. Why put more food into my body if I’m losing weight and still full of energy?

Do some research. Remember, people can lose weight with all different forms of diet, exercise, and medication. I found my way and am happy to share what has worked for me. I did some reading and came to find that there are no real rules to how many times and what times during the day we are ‘supposed’ to eat.

There is research supporting the benefits of breakfast and small portioned meals spread out about the day, but there is also research supporting skipping meals (especially if you are not hungry). The human body is built to go days without food and our ancestors grew used to this. Convenience is great, but the over availability of cheap food in our culture has led the obesity epidemic America is now carrying on it’s shoulders. So, don’t be afraid to skip a meal. You will grow accustomed to being skinny.

Remember, you don’t need to be thin to meet women (being that this is originally a dating advice blog and all). This is about you. You will feel better. If you feel better, you can easily be more positive and confident. Other people like to be around confident and positive people. If people like to be around you. You become a leader. If you are a leader, you will get benefits. Like attracting women and or getting promotions at work. So there is a correlation, yet remember who you are doing this for. With that said, here’s my diet streamlined…

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The 5 Step No Exercise, No Stress Diet

1. Eat 2-3 Meals a Day. Try to eat only when you are hungry.

2. Protein. Fat. Vegetables. Each meal is allowed these 3 food groups only.

3. Eat as much as you want – of the allowed food groups.

4. Don’t eat or drink carbs.  Estimated daily carb intake – under 40 grams

5. Take one cheat day per week  – eat as much of whatever you want.

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Don’t worry. You WILL lose at least 10 pounds in a month.

Do not use this diet for more than 4 weeks. I am not a doctor and would be doing a disservice suggesting anymore than 4 weeks. I’m not responsible for your weight loss, it’s on you bucko. Read the terms of service for more.

Remember the diet is as lenient as I could make it, and I express my concerns with modifying the restrictions to your liking. Don’t be afraid to do some more research on your own and creating a new diet tailored to fit your lifestyle and eating habits.

I’d be SUPER happy to hear what you guys came up with and what worked for you or what you are planning to try when it comes to diet and weight loss. Please comment.

More Resources

This post has covered as much as I could without doing more experiments and ultimately writing a book on the subject. But, a few people have asked for resources on low-carb dieting. I’ve looked around and I would absolutely recommend the ’4-Hour Body By Tim Ferris’. The diet I have outlined thus far is a bit different than his plan, yet it’s still a great way to get more insight into low-carb dieting.

Please, if you do decide to purchase this book, use the link below. It will help fund this blog, so I can keep giving you quality content completely for free.

Also, if you have found some good low-carb recipes that I skipped over, please share. I would love to try out some new dishes. Good eating, good-looking

Wait… hold on. If this post gets enough subscribers I would love to post your before and after pictures and will include your own custom diet plan, your story etc. in a whole new complimentary post.

It’s inspiring to everyone to see how people were able to do it themselves without buying expensive supplements, paying for gym membership and all these things that claim to be the magic bullet to weight loss.

I believe all it takes is time. Focus on changing your eating habits over time. I don’t suggest giving up any other habits though. Don’t try to quit smoking or stop drinking while on this. Try one thing at a time. After you have reached your goal you will have more than enough confidence to accomplish any other goal you have in queue for this beautiful new year. Hello 2012, welcome to my life.

What gets in the way of you getting things done? Procrastination is typically the culprit. Well, a way to combat this is being conscious. Conscious, meaning being aware.

We are beings of habit, of unconscious action. Being natural really. Whenever you do something that seems natural, it is because you are doing it unconsciously. Driving, walking, your mannerisms, body language, and worst of all your distractive habits.

Going to the bathroom, having a cigarette break, going to the water cooler, and even eating. We tend to do these things whenever we’ve got something else to get done. We don’t mean to, it’s just something that happens instinctively. Don’t beat yourself about it. In fact, you can enjoy it. Understand that you do need a break. Yet, don’t let your break last for longer than you really need.

Writing things down can be good. They say the shorter the pencil the longer your understanding of a subject. It’s good, yet it can be better.

You may not have the same lifestyle as the lenses this articles is being written in. Yet, I’m sure you can make a proper correlation. Understand that I’m writing from my point of view. With my lenses on. So, it does change the way I see thinga compared to people with different lifestyles. Though I am super sure that this will benefit anyone having a problem with getting things done or just have an affinity for being efficient.

People don’t get motivated to go to the gym. They go to the gym to get motivated. 

Start working. When you feel yourself stopping, get up walk around. Make sure that while you are walking. You are ‘thinking on your feet’. Don’t let your thoughts veer off into la-la land. People who can’t stay put are typically labeled ADD. When really, this isn’t anything to be ashamed of. It just means you think on your feet. You are constantly bombarded with so much creativity that you feel if you keep it to yourself you are doing the world a disservice. Well, remember that you can’t get your thoughts out to the world unless you learn to be conscious and get things done. While you are walking around a bit, still thinking about the task at hand, gather your thoughts, then walk back to your work station and continue.

Quitting. It’s why we say we are our own worst enemies. Because you are the only one that can quit, no one else can do it for you. Anyone that has gotten into creative work has gotten into it because they have good taste. They appreciate good music, art, language, and so much more yet I haven’t the space to put it here. Understand that you are your worst critic. Just keep creating. Because after time (maybe a real long time) your work will resemble exactly what your taste has craved all this time.

Create Deadlines. Not to-do lists. Every week, having something that needs to get done. Just one thing. Because on a to-do list you will write down something that usually takes about 4 times as much time as you actually think it will take. Factor in, mistakes, errors, problems with your computer or whatever else is man-made and inevitably fails on you on the most critical of moments.

If you get done what you have wanted to get done in a timely manner, then you can look forward to the next thing. Realize that, the end isn’t really the end. Once you’ve got something done typically there is something else to do. But, that’s what you have to realize. It’s not the completion of a task or project that should bring you validation (even if it’s what normally happens). Understand that if you have a to-do item on your list only 25% completed, that it should feel as good as completing the task 100%. Celebrate the small victories.

I had a fortune cookie not long ago. It read something like this – yet I am totally missing the preceding lines, though I remember that last line – Don’t let friends impose on you.

Stay away from discouragement. You are around negative people because you are good person. It’s not bad that you are around people that are putting you down. It’s admirable. You see the good in everyone, and give people the benefit of a doubt. Good on ‘ya mate. But, you have to realize that only when you have a great support system that things you really want will tend to manifest themselves a lot sooner.

You may love these people. They may even be family members. Don’t reward bad behavior. Don’t be afraid to excuse yourself from conversation. Whenever someone is projecting limiting beliefs on you (especially if they are someone of authority) just excuse yourself from conversation. Subconsciously they will realize that negative opinions aren’t tolerated by you. Overtime they will be conditioned to not be negative while in your presence. If not, you may have to consider cutting them off completely.

It’s hard to not listen to authority. Especially if you are someone who seeks guidance. Remember, it’s the rebels, the one’s who kept their frame, the ones that told career advisors their dreams, and even when faced with adversity, still shook it off and kept pursuing their goals – those are the ones that you see in movies, TV and radio (well, you listen to people on radio rather than see them). I know I am not including some more respectable occupations. So I’ll let you fill in anything that you are seeking to accomplish. Yet, my point is to distinguish talent from pure determinism. Being committed comes with the ability to completely separate yourself from the opinion of others. Don’t worry, I’ll always be here to tell you how awesome you are. Just realize that no matter how talented you are. You, your friends and your unconscious habits can be what’s really holding back. Keep it going my friend.

A few guidelines that will help you be social, in social situations of course. Say for instance you are at a small get-together, house party, dinner party, or meeting some new friends out for dinner.

In these situations you might end up meeting up with old friends, yet the number of new friends outweighs the older ones.

You could end up being stuck sat in a corner counting the minutes until you get home, or you can end up meeting some of the most, coolest, successful, forward thinking individuals that ultimately influence your life for the better. Oh yeah, and you will become popular.

1. Start talking immediately.

The longer you wait to talk, the weirder things become. The harder it becomes for you to start opening your mouth. You need to become a blip on everyone’s radar. Without talking, your blip is weak and not even seen. Start talking and you send out your signal. If there is a girl there that you are into, then you will have to engage her in conversation.

2. Remember names

You can’t engage her in conversation if you are not talking. So immediately when you enter the social situation, what’s the easiest way to start talking? Easy, just make sure to introduce yourself to everybody. Get all of their names.

Huge points if you can get into conversation immediately with the last person you introduced yourself to and remember the name of the first person you introduced yourself to. Using names will strongly engage people in conversation. A person’s name is the sweetest sound thing to them.

If you don’t know how to remember names. Use associations. One of the easiest ways to make name associations are with celebrities. If she says her name is Jessica. Think, Jessica Alba. If she says her name is Christina, think Christina Aguilera. Don’t mention the name association to them. This is just for you. Then, imagine for a second, visualize, the celebrity and the person who you just met hanging out. Get a clear picture in your head. Make it as specific and detailed as possible. This is guaranteed to make sure you don’t forget their names.

*BONUS*

This is how this works. It’s called mnemonics – here’s a game that you can play with someone you just met.

1. sun
2. shoe
3. tree
4. door
5. hive
6. sticks
7. heaven
8. gate
9. wine
10. hen

Now, remember that. It’s actually super easy. Don’t share that with anyone. Now, tell them. I can remember any 10 things you write down on this paper. Write them down, I will look at them, and I can remember them, at any time, even tomorrow (seriously you can).

Their list might go something like this.

1. Bowling Ball
2. Jet Plane
…. and so on and so forth.

It’s easy to memorize this list no matter how complex their items may be. This is how you do it. 1. Bowling Ball. Just visualize the bowling ball and the sun. Of course, anything that is numbered will have a corresponding item that is easy to remember. #1 being the sun. Be as descriptive as you can inside your own mind. Visualize the sun going bowling. The more ridiculous, the better and easier to remember.

So now, once you have done that with all 10 items you can give her back the paper. Anytime she says a number, your mind can easily recall the item associated with the number. If she says #1. Then you know that #1 rhymes with sun and you remember thinking about the sun going bowling. Not only will it make you popular among some new people, but you can also tell the girl you met to text you the next day with any number and you will still remember the item listed.

3. Storytelling

This tends to be one of the more important things. A lot of us develop good storytelling skills for many reasons. Yet, you can develop storytelling skills quite easily. Here are a few ground rules.

Bragging, justifying and qualifying. If you find yourself telling a story and all your doing is trying to make yourself sound cool, typically people will tune you out.

You know that guy. He always says things like “I did this, and I did that, then this happened and blah blah blah”. This is the kind of guy that people tune out, because he thinks he knows more or has experienced more than other people. And no one likes to have to compete when in conversation our goal is cooperation. It’s the easiest to become popular.

A good story has a few essential elements. But here are some extra ones that you probably haven’t thought about and can give your stories an extra boost in awesomeness.

Good stories have a Who, Where, What Happened, Conflict, Resolution & Punchline. But, what makes someone you just met stop listening to you, is the lack of a punchline or point.

Most of your stories have a Who, Where, What Happened, Conflict & Resolution, but what they are really missing are a point. A moment of self-reflection or a punchline.

Self-reflection is easy. You can start the sentence by saying “Now, looking back on that I now realize…” and fill in the blank. This will force you to self-reflect and allow the person to feel like they got the pay off from the story. Without, they will wonder why you are telling them these things. They will start to think you just are talking because you wanted to feel good about yourself, brag, and get validation or approval. Seeking approval shows feelings of inadequacy. Women are not attracted to unconfident men. Sorry.

As for the punchline. People find things funny when they have one or both of either elements: superiority and surprise. You can find this in all comedy. Watch your favorite comedy shows and notice what made the joke funny. It was superiority, surprise or both. Here is example illustrating what I mean.

Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.

This is funny because of the superiority factor. You the listener feel superior to the idiot. It also has surprise, you might have thought that you wouldn’t argue with an idiot just because he is an idiot. Yet, the change in perception makes the idiot the knowledgable one. Well, at least knowledgable in being stupid.

I was watching How I Met Your Mother today, which is most definitely one of my favorite sitcoms right now. Actually the sitcom is a lost art form, we are seeing less and less of them nowadays.

Well, anyway Neil Patrick Harris’ character ‘Barney’ is great with women. He has his own process for attracting and seducing women. While hearing him outline it on today’s show I was inspired to let go of my process. Well here goes…

Barney says he first ignores the girl and then gives her a back-handed compliment. That’s understandable. In TV world. Since ignoring her only makes you seem like an asshole (which insecure women like) and back-handed compliments only drop her self-esteem (which only works for insecure women, again).

Well, let me show how it’s done in the real world.

I give a girl attention only when she is showing interest. If she isn’t showing interest I give her attention, though it’s categorized differently. Instead it’s more of negative attention (since if you ignore her completely you will lose her). I will talk to her, though seem as if I’m not really paying attention. Like if I’m just doing it to be nice. For instance, while I’m talking to her and holding eye contact, I will finish my sentence by turning away from her, as if I’m about to walk away.

Also verbally I am a master flirt. I do a few things. You can choose to do anyone or mix them up. I say, just take one example and run with it. I’m not going to outline everything I do and know because this would turn into a book (which I’m still working on by the way). So here goes.

I misinterpret what she says as a come-on. I mean anything and everything can be considered a come on.

Sometimes the more ridiculous the better. If you have met a girl and gotten her number but have no idea how to start a conversation over text (of course leading towards meeting her again) try this. I say “hey stop it, can’t you see I’m trying to focus here ”.

This is implying that she’s flirting with you. It’s not only used in text, you can use it person. Just tell her, “hey, stop, come on, can’t you see I’m trying to focus here, what are you doing?” She’ll say “what?, what?” This is known to some as a form of teasing. Teasing is a good thing. It’s what girls like, just don’t overdo it. Make sure to smile as well.

Another thing that is very powerful is to use roleplaying. Roleplaying is when you put her into an implied role. An imaginary role. Typically it would be best to put each other in a role in which a relationship is formed. If she ever does or says something you don’t like you can say “You know what? That’s it, we are so breaking up, I had enough of this relationship”. You can continue roleplaying, misinterpreting and teasing from here. These all engage her in conversation. Once she’s really engaged, go for the close.

Try these out, they can never go wrong. Just make sure to be light, playful and be smiling. Cheers!

You can learn from many different places. You can learn some great things to do and say right here.

You can also go out with a friend who is just naturally charismatic and observe the way he carries himself, you can even go as far to even write down what he says.

Though, if you like movies, have some free time though also want to add to your repertoire of attractive traits and witty lines then I suggest the following movies. These are movies that have helped me when speaking to women.

They all have men that are attractive to women. They are not your stereotypical hollywood romance movies. I believe these ones have a lot of personality and are great for picking up new body language, fashion tips and engaging one-liners. Enjoy.

Def Jam’s How To Be A Player

Bill Bellamy is a player in this movie. The only thing that I don’t like about this one is that he has to lie to everyone to get what he wants. I don’t believe in lying to women in order to date multiple women.

You can get the same result by being open about your intentions. Though, he techniques are flawless. There is one scene in the movie were he dances with a woman he doesn’t find attractive in order to stir a jealousy plot-line with the hottest woman in the room. Sneaky yes, genius, of course.

Alfie

Alfie is a movie I can almost recite line for line. He just has a way with words in this movie. Of course, also in this movie he tends to lie to the women he is with and is why he ends up feeling so alone most of time.

This movie is a great lesson in banter. A lot of what I say actually came from this movie, and it’s so natural I don’t even remember I got them from here. One of my favorite lines are “Stop fishing for compliments”.

Hitch

Hitch is funny in that it’s similar to what I do for a living. He has some great points especially in the beginning where he says that when a woman says she’s not ready to date she either really means one of two things.

Either “get way from me now” or “try harder stupid. Of course, you understand that you should assume it’s try harder stupid only because then once you pursue you can find out for real what she actually means.

Van Wilder

Van Wilder is by far one of my favorites. This movie is great for learning the art of sexual innuendos. If you are able to talk openly about sex it makes the idea of having sex a lot more realistic for both parties.

Another lesson I got from Van Wilder is that he is always giving value. He is always making people feel good around him. Because of this he is a leader and can seriously do almost anything he wants whenever he wants.

This blog is about dating tips though, self-improvement is vital. It’s ideal to want to grow all the time to be attractive to women.

So lifting some weights can’t hurt. Unless you get real sore. Make sure to stretch and have some protein. If you don’t stretch you can injure yourself. So, stretch before and after your work-outs to get rid of injury and soreness.

With this you will add 20 more pounds onto the maximum amount of weight you bench-press every 4 weeks. A bit deceptive considering the title though I’m only going to tell you what works. You will bench 225 if you’re maximum bench-press is now 205. By maximum bench I mean how much you can lift up just once. Just one time. All the way down and up without any help from a spotter.

What you can do is this. If every 4 weeks you could add 20 pounds to your maximum and if you’re now benching 135 pounds, in 4 months you will bench 195-225 pounds.

135 is one of those big 45 pound weights on each side of the bench press. 225 is 2 big 45 weights on each side of the bench press and it feels totally badass to lift that much. Plus you will have a bigger chest, bigger triceps and push people around if you were so inclined to do. Even better you can actually bench-press your girlfriend. Which is cool.

Tips from experience.

I have been lifting weights since I was 13 years old. I played football in high school and I probably lifted more weights than I spend time on the field. I haven’t lifted weights in 3 years, though my body hasn’t seem to have gotten out of shape all that bad. So, since I’m back in the gym, though I’d share with you a quick way to get big a lot quicker than without a plan.

So this is your regiment. Just benching. The other auxiliary lifts can just be a regular 3 sets of 10 repetitions. Meaning that you will lift the weight 10 times in 3 different instances. Take breaks between sets. It really doesn’t matter how long you wait. Since lifting weights isn’t an aerobic exercise. You can take your time, since lifting weights actually burns fat and build muscles for at least 2 days after you’re done. So, essentially you need recovery time. You will notice that when you get stronger, recovery time get shorter. I typically do one set to one song which is about 2 minutes, then when the song is done I start again.

Typically I don’t work out for more than an hour. Especially if you’re just starting you want motivation to go back and you don’t want to burn yourself out. Also, it’s said that after an hour of working out you actually begin to lose muscle. So it’s best to get some rest and save aerobic exercises like running for another day.

Let’s get to it.

This is a 4 week process. By the start of your second cycle through the 4 week process you will have at the least added an extra 10 pounds to your maximum bench press. An important tip to remember. If you aren’t struggle on your last rep than you are not doing it right. You want to be struggling really hard to get your last rep up. Then you should still try and do it anyways. That’s the rep that gets you stronger.

Week 1 – 3 x 3

3 sets of 3. You will start off by doing 3 sets of 3 repetitions. That means since it’s a lot less reps than you will be doing normally, you can put on a bit more weight. This is testing to see how much weight you can put on by doing as little reps as possible. Though, trust me you will be sore, since it will be a lot of weight. Now, let’s say you can normally bench 135 10 times in a row. So, then for 3 x 3 you want to add a bit more weight. I suggest trying to add 15-20 pounds to what you normally lift 10 times. So that will be benching 155 pounds. That’s a 45 plate on each side plus 10 pound weights on each side. Do that for 3 sets of three.

Week 2 – 5 x 5

5 sets of 5. This is my opinion the hardest week. Because it’s a whole lot sets and a steady amount of reps. Of course you are going to want to use less weight. I would suggest going back to your standard of 135 pounds. It’s important to actually write all this down, so by the end of the process you can see how in the second cycle you have added weight. After the second cycle you will see a huge difference in your body. Though, for now I highly suggest you put it down on paper.

Week 3 – 10, 8, 6

This week you will do 3 sets of bench. This first set is for 10 reps, the second set is of 8 and the last set is of 6. That means you would start off with 135 pounds for the next set and add at least 5 pounds for the second 2 sets. Notice how this is all getting you closer to overall benching more weight. Notice how through your second cycle you will add more weight to each of these sets.

Week 4 – 5, 4, 3, 2, 1

This is it, your maximum week. This is the week when you see how much you can really lift. What is your true maximum? Start off with decent amount of weight for the first set of 5. Then add on more weight until you get to your last set and rep. Typically when first starting keep them same weight for 3, 2 and 1. If you can bench 135 10 times you should try to slap on 185 pounds and see if you could get it up at least once without help. 185 pounds is a 45 plate on each side plus a 25 plate on each side.

Now, that you have figured out your maximum bench, you will start all over next week. Lifting 3 x 3. Then by the time you get to the fourth week your maximum will have increased. It’s actually quite amazing. So start this week off with at least 185 for your 3 x 3. Take off some weight if you can’t get the weight up. It’s more important to finish all your sets and reps rather than quitting because you put on to much. Hope this helps and have a badass summer, thanks to me.

The first date can be as awkward or as smooth as you make it. It’s up to you to make sure you maintain the fun vibe she found so intriguing from the first time you met. It’s important to know that dates aren’t as intense as they used to be.

The standard dinner and movie is evolving into something much more. This is your chance to put a stamp of approval on your relationship and progress forward into a something more intimate.

An interview-style date, where you interrogate and trade resumes with each other doesn’t sound like a lot of fun, right? Make a point to take the date on the fun route by loosening up and not taking it so seriously.

I personally have a hard time remembering great date ideas. I’ll sit there and think “Oh crap, she said yes, she’s wants to hang out”. All while I have no idea where the hell I am going to take her or what we are to do. Though, I did come up with an amazing list here so we can come back to it in case we ever forget.

1. Salsa Lessons

2. Karaoke

3. Dance club

4. Arcade

5. Chuck E. Cheese

6. Billiards room

7. County Fair

8. Street Festival

9. Amusement Park

10. Rodeo

11. Water Park

12. Mini-Golf

13. Parade

14. Make Clay Pottery

15. Lazer Tage

16. Batting Cages

17. Rock Climbing

18. Paintball

19. Water Balloon Fight

20. Bowling

21. Local Tourist Destination

22. Paddle Boat

23. Air Boat Ride

24. Jet Ski

25. Sight-seeing

26. Malls

27. Toy Stores

28. Amazing Views

29. Ride The Train

30. Zoo

31. Hiking

32. Planetarium

33. Museum

34. Bike Riding

35. Comedy Show

36. Musicals

37. Plays

38. Movie Premiere

39. Live Band or Concert

40. Drive-in Theatre

41. Sporting Match

42. Kiddie Park/Playground

43. Taking Silly Pictures

44. Spontaneous Travel

45. People Watching

46. Park Walk

47. Beach Volleyball

48. Soccer

49. Frisbee

50. Kite Building & Flying

51. Kmart or Target

52. Vintage Store

53. Shopping

54. Ice-cream taste testing

55. Wine-tasting

56. Bungee Jumping

57. Skydiving

58. Road Trip

59. Trapeze Lessons

60. Helicopter Ride

61. Small Plan Ride

62. Parasailing

63. Surfing

64. Wake-boarding

65. Burritos Date

66. Watching the sunset

67. Watching the sunrise

68. Star/Moon gazing

69. Hookah and wine at your place

70. Coffee Shop

71. Smoothies

72. Drinking in the afternoon

73. Making tacos together

74. Painting pottery

75. Carve a pumpkin

76. Making homemade ice cream

77. Play with fireworks

78. Ice skating

79. Playing guitar for her

80. Playing Guitar Hero

81. Sneak into the top of a tall building

82. Ride in a hot air balloon

83. Go camping

84. Boat rental

85. Go-carts

86. Limousine Date

87. Bubble bath and champagne

88. Skim-boarding

89. Oysters by the harbor

90. Playing basketball

91. Get your palms read

92. Make out all the way up an elevator

93. Test-drive or rent an expensive car

94. Making s’mores

95. Improv class

96. Watch your favorite childhood cartoons

97. Go to the library and read each other children’s books

98. Go to a drum circle on the beach

99. Ride down a lake with beers

100. Snow angels and snowball fighting

101. Twister

If you aren’t sure she feels completely comfortable being alone with you invite her out to something you are already doing like an event or party you are already attending with your friends.

Taking things above and beyond can be a bit difficult. Figure out what she is comfortable with doing. I know that most girls wouldn’t be thrilled about going to a boxing match. If she’s a sweet heart, treat her to an afternoon picnic complete with crust-less peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Most importantly, make sure your date is full of different activities taking place in different places.

After your date her friends will ask her all about it. Would you rather her say “He was nice, we went to see a movie” or “He was so much fun, we walked down to the Fair, we road a rollercoaster and he won me this stuffed teddy bear by dunking bozo the clown into a pool of water, it was great.”

As much as I enjoy giving out free dating tips and advice I had to slow down blog posting while finishing up my book.

So, I though with Valentine’s Day having just passed and me being such a bad Valentine that I’d make it up to you.

A quick tad bit of an update on my life. I am having a hell of a time right now.

I really cannot complain. I have met and connected with the most amazing people recently, it’s really propelling me towards continuing a life full of inspiration, creativity and of course love.

The book isn’t available for sale yet. Though here is an excerpt from Chapter 3 on

Working Venues…

Now looking around the room, you see different groups of people. You may see a group of girls that are all dressed the same. One of them has a tiara, some of them have flowers, and some of them have balloons. Obviously, they’re celebrating something, whether it is a bachelorette party or a birthday, you don’t know.

This is a great way to understand how the club works. Approach them and just say, “congratulations!” Make sure to say it loud. Distribute eye contact to all of them evenly and be expressive with your hands. They will all respond.

You can continue from there but the attraction phase isn’t until the next chapter. That is just one easy way to open up interaction with women who are looking for a good time. Make sure to be that good time that they’re looking for.

When girls go out in groups, they are going to be a bit protective of their friends. There’s an advantage and a disadvantage to this. If you tend to be a taller guy with a wider frame, it’s going to be easier for you to be seen. People notice you, so you can initially interact quite easily. Though, you may come off as a bit more intimidating. So that’s where you should have a balance. You want to make sure that you smile and that you’re not leaning-in so much when you talk or listen to them.

On the other hand, if you tend to be a smaller guy like me, it may be a bit harder for you to be noticed. That’s why you have to dress up a bit. That’s why you have to speak louder. That’s why you have to talk with your hands and make sure you make eye contact with everybody. Though the advantage is that you can get a lot closer to women and put your hands on women a lot sooner.

Well that’s it for now, and that excerpt isn’t even exactly official yet since I’m still going through the editing process for this one. Though I hope you can see I’m not leaving you guys behind. You are going to know everything that I have worked so hard to figure out after years of running around the nightclubs.

Oh no, the ever so elusive friend zone. Entry into here typically means no way out. Seriously dude. It’s best to keep it from happening in the first place so let’s take a look at some of the symptoms.

She brings you into conversation, talking about other guys. Now, if she starts to talk to you about a guy she likes or some guy in general, steer clear of this one.

Girls will even go as far to call you just to talk about their relationship woes once you let them. Don’t let them, if you have, you have just been what? Wait for it. Yep, friend zoned.

Best way to dodge this bullet is to change the subject. Do this by doing what I like to call linking topics. Though remember, you have to make it seem like you didn’t completely ignore what she said. She says “Oh yea, Jimmy is such a nice guy he wants to take me out for dinner.”

Don’t get interested and ask more questions or even keep listening. Just acknowledge her then switch topics. “Oh that’s cool anyways…”. You can go into a story about something exciting for you. Even if it’s a crappy story. Just go for it. This will unconsciously set off a switch in her head that says, “I’m never going to talk to him, if I talk about other guys”. Damn straight your not.

Another thing girls tend to do is talk about god awful things just to bore us to out of liking them. Seriously, they do this. Whether it is unconscious or not. If she’s talking about work or school, time to cut that thread.

Girls laugh and flirt with guys that are not in friend zone. So, make sure to laugh and joke. That’s a good thing. Also, dinner is something that could actually land you in the friend zone. I know it sounds counter-intuitive though it’s true.

Friends go out for dinner. Lovers go out for drinks. If you end up at dinner sitting across the table from her and there has been some sort of barrier between the two of you for sometime it’s time to break it. Take a seat at the bar so you can scoot closer to her and break the ‘touch’ barrier.

A few things to pay attention to here are. Eye Contact. Long eye contact will turn a friend into a lover. Try it out. Let her break eye contact first. There’s also another thing that guys don’t pay attention to and is why they end up losing out against the competition. (In my new book I have a whole chapter dedicated to ‘beating the competition’)

A lot of guys think they are being reasonable when they take a girl out to the bar. They think it is okay for another guy to approach their girl and conversate with them. Nope nope. She’s just testing you my friend. Of course, you don’t want a girlfriend who does this, so take note, though if you’re still dating around, also know that a lot of girls still do this.

Real easy. Just step in and start conversation with the guy and block out your girl. Yeah I know, it’s not typical as of a regular ‘pick-up’ situation but I’m talking about being on a date with a girl here. You block her out, (she shouldn’t have as much social competence as you do by now anyways) and chat up the guy. Just tell him straight “This is my girl, don’t talk to her, no worries you’re cool man, just leave us be”. Handshake, smile, continue.

She is just testing out your social strength. She needs yo see that you know how to control a situation. Take control, have some savior fare. Tell next time, leave some comments partna’.

I’ll be there! so, you’re ass better be.

Come listen, and hear from Joshua Pellicer and I on the topic of developing your own individual method to meeting & attracting women. Totally free, by the way.

Joshua and I have been coaching together on and off for years now. I can say by far I wouldn’t choose anyone else to coach alongside, so listen up to what he has to say or else!

Here are the event details below…

EVENT: “Your Personal Pickup Formula”

If you’re like most guys, you’re more than frustrated with the “glass ceiling” that you’re hitting up against. You’ve seen some success with the different stuff you’ve tried in the past, but you really want to know how to take it to “The Next Level” with your ability to meet, attract, and connect with gorgeous women. Hop on this free teleclass as Author Joshua Pellicer shares his secrets for “Hacking Attraction.”

In this teleclass you’ll learn:

• Learn The 4 Different “Pickup Types” And Find Out With One YOU Are

• How To Identify & Eliminate Your Biggest “Sticking Point”

• The 5 Simple Steps to Create A Powerful “I Am An Attractive Guy” Belief That Women Can FEEL When They See You
  

• 30 Minutes of Q&A To Get YOUR Question Answered For Free

DATE & TIME: Wednesday, February 2nd at 8:00pm Eastern

FORMAT: Attend via Phone

TO ACCESS THE TELECLASS, CLICK THIS LINK…

http://InstantTeleseminar.com/?eventid=17474025

***This is a free Teleclass from Joshua Pellicer, Author of “The Tao of
Badass,” Founder of “Game On” on Sirius XM Radio, and Co-Founder of
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Sign-up for the live bootcamp below…

If you enjoyed the telecast or are enjoying it right now, or didn’t listen to it though want to sign-up for the big bootcamp in New York then follow Hacking Attraction here.

This is the only time you can get this discount pricing, and since he’s a good friend I’m sharing this with you.