The 35 Game Killers
This list was constructed in order for guys to be able know exactly how to generate attraction. More specifically, how to get a woman to chase them. This is a guideline, and refer back to this while learning and progressing. There may be things on this list you took care of. Though, there might also be some things you are still guilty of doing.
Some people tend to get confused though, remember this is a list of all things to NOT do. These are the do-not’s of true attractive men. Start going down this list and handling each one every time you are in a social interaction. Soon, you should have crossed out everything on this list. Once you have done so, you will have a crystal clear way of generating attraction with women all the time. Most of the things on this list display one of two things, neediness and approval seeking behavior. Each are Game Killers.
1- Fidgety Movements & Tight Shoulders
Fidgety movements are when you are touching the back of your neck, fiddling with the label on your beer bottle or any other unnecessary anxious tendency. It shows discomfort. Same thing goes for tense and tight shoulders. Relax and rolls your shoulders back and down, this subcommunicates comfort and confidence.
2- Taking Yourself Too Seriously or Being too Sophisticated. Not Smiling
Studies show that smiling makes someone immediately 7 times more attractive. If you are taking yourself too seriously no one will.
3- Speaking Too Quickly
Speaking too fast subcommunicates that you are not used to holding other’s attention and are afraid that someone might interrupt you.
4- Overuse Of Filler Words (Like, Umm, Right)
Filler words can make the flow of a conversation become very mundane. The conversation will sound long and drawn out, boring even. Put spaces between your words. This build anticipation and keeps people engaged.
5- Standing With Legs Too Close To Each Other
Widen you stance. Shoulder-width apart is just fine. With your legs to close it shows that you feel as if you don’t deserve to take up the space around you.
6- Slouching When Sitting Or Standing
Slouching shows that subconsciously you would rather seem smaller, even go unnoticed. Attractive men are comfortable being acknowledged. You also won’t look as sure of what you are saying. Roll your shoulders back and down here as well.
7- Speaking Too Loudly Or Softly
You speak softly when you are a bit embarrassed or unsure of what you are talking about. Hoping not to be heard. The polar opposite of that is speaking too loudly. This shows that you demand to be heard and comes off a bit needy. Try to find a middle ground. Though, if you had to choose between speaking to loudly between speaking to softly, choose speaking loudly. If you can’t be heard you can’t engage.
8- Pecking/Leaning-In
Leaning-in subcommunicates the idea that you believe she is so valuable and everything she says is so important, that she doesn’t have to do any work and you will put in all the effort just so you can hear her. Would you rather lean into a girl giving her the chance to pull back or stand straight and allow her to lean into you?
9- Positive Body Language Too Early
Positive body language is the idea that everyone is mindful of their personal space. Once something enters our direct line of vision and enters our personal space we become completely aware and react accordingly. If you were to be completely facing a woman and said “You’re cute” and just stood there staring at her, it subcommunicates approval seeking behavior. Turn away slightly to get her to chase your positive body language and lower the tension.
10- Chasing When They Walk Away/Turn Away
If she turns away from you, don’t circle around her to get her attention. Instead, keep talking over your shoulder. You want to mirror her body language and turn away just as she does.
11- Positive Body Language After They Do Something That You Wouldn’t Take From Someone You Aren’t Interested In
Don’t reward bad behavior by still facing her. Turn away. Don’t be afraid to turn your back to a beautiful woman.
12- Answering Questions Too Early/Quickly
Attraction is purely curiosity. To keep her attracted don’t give up all your information. Make her feel as if their were more to you. By not answering her questions so early, you keep yourself from being filtered out so early and gives you time to display attractive qualities through body language.
13- Turning Your Head Too Quickly When Addressed
Some call this ‘snapping’. Slow down your head movement. Take a second before turning to someone who calls you.
14- Returning To Previous Conversation At First Break In Current Conversation
If she changes the subject keep on going with it. Don’t go back to what you were talking about, because it seems as if you were not listening and if you have nothing else to talk about. If she brings up the old subject, even better, now she is invested.
15- Failing To Choose And Escalate Your Target
Sometimes a girl will pick herself and you will know if she is the one to escalate with. Though don’t wait for it. Hurry-up, pick a girl and escalate.
16- Too Eager To Hear Them Too Early (Before Rapport)
What you say doesn’t matter. Niether what she says either. In the attraction phase you want to just be flirty, having, light playful no-content conversation.
17- Replying With Overly Thought Out Answers Or Over Clarifying
Don’t put too much thought into what you are initially saying. Too much information can hurt you here. Hold back some answers so she can pry you for more.
18- Being Too Verbose
This is not a huge deal though be mindful of using unnecessary words to describe something when you shouldn’t be taking conversation so seriously anyways.
19- Being Bold Instead Of Confident
The bold guy who approaches women knows he’s getting rejected so he just puts on a show.
20- Polar Opposing Insecurity Compensation
If you are passive and normally are taken advantage by having no respect for your boundaries then you may try to change that by acting like in the other end of the spectrum. You may start to be aggressive and have no respect for other’s boundaries just so you can say you weren’t passive. Both these polar opposites are developed from insecurity. Find a middle ground. Assertiveness, having respect for yours and other’s boundaries though being able to express yourself freely.
21- Unnecessary Cursing Or Enthusiasm
Pretty self-explanatory. Don’t curse with people who have just met and try to match their energy level rather than knocking it out the ball park.
22- Qualifying Yourself
Qualifying is what someone does when they believe someone is of higher value than them. You want to get her to qualify herself to you first.
23- Bantering In Rapport
Rapport is a serious and very vulnerable time in interaction. She may share with you something she has had a hard time being able to express in the past and by joking around at such a serious time in conversation she may never be able to trust to open up to you again.
24- Waiting For Them When They Leave (All Reasons Except Purse)
If she ask you to stay while she leaves to the bathroom, don’t stay. She’s trying to set up the dynamic where she leads, and that will never lead anywhere intimate. Though, if she leaves her purse, stay.
25- Skipping Steps In The Map
If you skip the attraction phase you end up in the friend zone. If you skip rapport, you have no trust. If you skip seduction, you have no relationship.
26- Buying Time/Attention – Supplication
Don’t buy girls drinks. They will collect them all night long.
27- Chasing Too Early
Before you have built mutual attraction you don’t want to make it seem as if she is such a huge deal to you. Remember you don’t need her to be happy.
28- Bragging
Similar to qualifying though a bit more blatant. Makes it seem as if you are begging for approval
29- Too Cool For School
This is the guy posted up by the bar (usually good-looking) who thinks women have to approach him. Wake-up man, you miss 100% of the shots you never take.
30- Ignoring Their Friends In A Group
Make sure to distribute your attention evenly. The quiet girl, who isn’t have as much fun as the rest of her friends will be the reason you get blown-out. Make sure to engage her immediately.
31- Condescending On Their Personality
As an outsider you will never fit in if you belittle people and try to make it seem as if though you are superior.
32- Ignoring Touch
If you don’t touch there is no attraction. There’s no other way.
33- Being Afraid To Lead
It’s a man’s job to lead. A man races and a woman paces.
34- Being Afraid Of Rejection
Rejection is part of the game. Remember, you miss 100% of the shots you never take. This is all a learning experience.
35- Being Afraid To Pull The Trigger
A woman will forgive you for being a man, though never for being a chicken. She spends hours getting ready and wears uncomfortable high heels in order to look sexy and you never even make a move. Validate her, by at least trying to make a move. She will respect you for it. “Hey, I’m just a guy I can’t help myself”
If you liked that you might like these too...
Leave a comment
As always Kevin great info. These mistakes, if remedied are really the point of change. I’ve implemented alot of these rules, if you will, into my interactions over the past year and it’s been for the better. Thanks for constantly addressing the issues and making it make sense Kevin. ~Cheers
Franklin
November 16, 2010
Hey, no problem man. Thanks for the review. I’m glad to hear that they work and it all makes sense.
kevin
November 17, 2010